My last Sunday in Orange Farm

Sunday, February 12th

President Nyama was working so much that I didn't get much of a chance to visit with him until Saturday night. After the children went to bed, the adults stayed up talking. We talked about the temple trip and how special it was for the ladies in the branch. We discussed self reliance and how important it is for the members to learn to help themselves. He told me a wonderful story about how he had attended a self reliance workshop as a young man and then decided to start a business selling envelopes. He and his pregnant wife would sit on their living room floor and cut out the envelopes with a small knife like blade. He said they made 1,000 envelopes that first night. He was successful with that business and then started selling envelopes for X-rays. He said they didn't need to seal the X-ray envelopes so they wouldn't need to buy paste for them which would allow him to make more profit. Eventually the business folded and he moved on to repairing cell phones.  It was really interesting listening to how he came to Johannesburg to work while his wife and children stayed in Zimbabwe. He said he slept on the floor of a small room in Johannesburg. He mentioned there were times he sent all of his earnings to his wife and he had no food. Since that time he has had several other employment opportunities. He is currently working for coca cola. He is a hard working man. I think we finally went to bed at midnight. 

I was so exhausted when we went to bed  that I didn't get much sleep. I think a part of me was excited about seeing everyone at church again but not looking forward to saying goodbye. When we left the house to begin our walk to church we noticed that it was a beautiful morning. 

The sun was out but it wasn't too hot.

We had to cross a few mud puddles from the recent summer showers

 I always love it when I see the ladies carrying things on their heads. 

Church

Church was hard today

I don't even know where to begin

I stood outside for a few minutes before church began and watched as families walked across the school yard to the temporary buildings the locals call speed spaces. 

A few members stood by the door and greeted everyone who entered the speed space that was designated as the chapel. The young elders were excited as they ran the hose into the font that sat between two speed spaces outside. They were preparing for a baptism that would be directly after church today.

I found a seat near a fan because it was already beginning to warm up. After a few moments a young man came and sat next to me. We chatted for a minute and I discovered he had been baptized a few years previous but had become inactive. His sister joined him in the empty seat on the other side of him. I still had an empty seat and when Siphokazi came in I asked her to sit next to me. She shyly came over but sat down and edged her way to the far end of her seat nearest the wall. It was really unusual behavior for her because Siphokazi was one of the children who always sat near me and traced the veins in my hand, or ran her fingers through my hair. She was the first to offer to carry my bag to primary. I didn't know what to make of this behavior. Siphokazi was the last child to see us leave Orange Farm. Hers was the last face I saw as I drove out of the parking lot. I couldn't help but think she was protecting her little heart from one more break. 

When the congregation began to sing, "I believe in Christ". The tears began to flow. I know God lives, I know he loves the members of Orange Farm. Life is hard in the township. Many struggle to put food on the table. I am so grateful that they let me into their lives these past two weeks. My heart is overflowing with love for the Saints in Orange Farm. They try so hard to live the gospel and to follow the commandments. It isn't always easy. 

This young girl, Tholakele, is a new member of the church. She went to the temple with us. She was so happy to go. She told me that it was a very special day for her. 

 After Sacrament Meeting the Makundo family and I posed for a photo together.

 Kelly and her baby, Palesa, sat with me for awhile during Relief Society. It was so hard to concentrate because I was trying to take everything in. I was studying the faces of the women I had come to know and love, the lady in front on me, Sister Viola in her beautiful Congolese print skirt and matching scarf, the mothers with babies on their backs gently rocking back and forth, the women sitting closely with one arm around the other, the Relief Society President, Sister Mazwi standing at the podium making announcements. I thought about the fact that two weeks ago I didn't know Sister Mazwi because I hadn't had an opportunity to get to know her before I left Orange Farm and now I loved her as if I knew her all my life. 

Kelly kept telling me she was going back to America with me.

 Sister Ellen, my dear, dear friend asked me to come and sit outside with her. She was already crying when I sat down. I remembered the last time I left when she and I embraced, I sobbed. I could feel the tears coming as Ellen told me how much she loved me and was grateful that I didn't judge her and that I was her friend. She asked me to continue to pray for her and Anna who is on a mission. We wept as we shared our deep love for one another. It was a sacred moment.

 My sweet Rarisang joined me after primary. She took my necklace off and placed it around her neck. 

Later Rarisang's mother, Candice came to say        goodbye. I gave Candice and some of the others CTR rings or bracelets that I had brought. 
                                                                           Candice gave me a necklace she had made.

 I was sitting in the back of the chapel with Kelly, Palesa and Rarisang taking pictures and before I knew it I was surrounded by  children who wanted to be in the photo.

 By this time I was a mess, I couldn't stop the tears

Sister Moyane, who is the Primary President, asked me to join her family for a photo. 

I just had to laugh when I saw the look on her teen age sons face. 
I guess teen aged boys are the same all over the world.

Then one final photo with the Nyama family.

I had been dreading this moment all day. A few days ago it hit me that I was going to have to say goodbye to my loved ones in Orange Farm all over again.
 It was wonderful to spend so much time with them but now I would have to part with them all over again. I had asked Abram, my driver to come earlier than I had originally planned. I just couldn't put the final goodbye off any longer. 

The Lee's and I went to see a movie called Collateral Beauty. The movie is about life, and death and everything in between. It made me reflect on how painful it can be to love. When we allow people into our hearts, we become vulnerable. There is a price we pay when we love. We risk the pain of losing them. I thought of the pain I felt when my father died, and when I lost my grandparents. I thought of how hard it has been for me to not have my children in my home anymore. I knew that I would see still see them but not having them in my home everyday was painful.

The movie made me reflect on both of our  missions in Orange Farm and in Ukraine. When I left my family for 18 months, it was very painful to say goodbye. I love my children and grandchildren with all of my heart. I couldn't imagine being away from them for so long.  However, Heavenly Father blessed me with a love for the people of Ukraine and Orange Farm. On both missions my husband and I served and attended the same ward the whole time and the people became our family. 

So after 18 months, when  I had to say goodbye to people I had come to love with all my heart. I wept. 

Leaving the children of Orange Farm and Tembisa was so difficult because I know that some of them don't have a mother to love them. Their life has been hard. Some of them have been abandoned by parents, some have lost them to death. 

The moments I had to spend with them were special. As I held some of those children in my arms  I could feel the Saviors love for them.  
Love is a gift that Heavenly Father gives his children. 

Although it is painful to leave, I am so blessed that my heart has been opened, that my Heavenly Father led me to Orange Farm and Tembisa to be his servant. I am grateful that I have a wonderful husband and children at home waiting for me. I am so grateful that I had a mother who I always knew loved me. 

  I pray that these sweet children and women in Orange Farm who I have come to know and love will feel the Lord's love for them and will know that I will never forget them. My heart is so full. 
When Abram came to take me back to Johannesburg and I climbed into his car I was completely exhausted. I was drained. I felt depleted but I was so grateful that I had this amazing opportunity to serve in Orange Farm and to spend the last two weeks filling my cup.

"My cup runneth over"

COME AWAY WITH ME